Drop your joke

965

Mon Oct 11, 2010 5:35 pm
Veteran
128 Posts
1 dutch man, 1 german and 1 belgium have a conversation.
the dutch man says i have the smallest arms of the world.
the belgium says i have the smallest head.
than the german says i have the smallest dick.

they decide to go to the guinness book of records.

first the dutch man, when he came out he shouted YES! i have the smallest arms.
than the belgium man goes inside. Also when he came out he shouted YES! i have the smallest head
At least the german goes inside. He came out and shout WHO The F*ck is Justin Bieber!
Mon Oct 11, 2010 6:41 pm
Thoroughbred
1403 Posts
lol!


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Mon Oct 11, 2010 8:21 pm
Legend
508 Posts
Sad I <3 Bieber
Mon Oct 11, 2010 8:25 pm
Thoroughbred
1403 Posts
— hOtty wrote
Sad I <3 Bieber


so you care about his **** also?


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Mon Oct 11, 2010 8:37 pm
Hero
637 Posts
loooooooooool nice one baawow Very Happy


Mon Oct 11, 2010 9:14 pm
Veteran
128 Posts
ty Very Happy
Mon Oct 11, 2010 10:46 pm
Legend
508 Posts
Apache?  Baaaaaaaby baaaby baby oooohhh !!
Tue Oct 12, 2010 2:21 am
Thoroughbred
1679 Posts
There is a similar type Trinidad joke.

A Guyanese, Grenadian and Trinidadian are sitting at a bar drinking.

The Grenadian drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Grenada our glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink from the same  glass twice".

The Guyanese, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his sawed-off shot gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Guyana we have so much sand to make
glasses that we don't need to drink out of the same glass twice either.

The Trinidadian, cool as a cucumber, picks up his beer and drinks it, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his 9mm. gun and shoots the Grenadian and the Guyanese, and catches his glass.

He says, "In trinidad, we have so many Grenadians and Guyanese that we  don't have to drink with the same ones twice.


Tue Oct 12, 2010 10:15 am
Legend
501 Posts
Wed Oct 13, 2010 3:43 pm
Clan Leader
5791 Posts
LOL Wanna go drink with a few mexicans & justin bieber?
Wed Oct 13, 2010 3:49 pm
Veteran
119 Posts
LOL baadd nice ones bawow and smith!
Wed Oct 13, 2010 4:26 pm
Spammer
316 Posts
Very Happy


Watch out, im behind the boxes..
Thu Oct 14, 2010 10:05 am
Spammer
338 Posts
lol nice one smith xD

Two Scots, a father and his son, go to America.
- Daddy, when we’ll arrive?
- Shut up and swim.

- Why do Scots watch porn films from the end to the beginning?
- Because they like a happy ending, when the prostitute gives the money back to the client.

- Mummy, mummy, why is daddy swaying in the backyard?
- Shut up, and give me more bullets.

Two friends:
- Tonight I am going to organize a group sex session in my apartment. Do you want to come?
- Of course! How many people are coming?
- Three, if you bring your girlfriend.

A little boy asked his mother:
- Mummy, why are you white and I am black?
- Don’t even ask me that, when I remember that party..., you are lucky that you don’t bark.

One man calls emergency:
- Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom!
After five minutes, the same man calls back:
- It is OK, I found another one.
Mon Nov 22, 2010 4:22 am
Clan Leader
5791 Posts
Got this email & hadda paste it here:
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.  
 
ATTORNEY:  What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS:     He said , 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY:  And why did that upset you?
WITNESS:     My name is Susan!

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS:     Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Are you sexually active?
WITNESS:     No , I just lie there.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  This myasthenia gravis , does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS:     Yes.
ATTORNEY:  And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS:     I forget..
ATTORNEY:  You forget?  Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

___________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS:     We both do.
ATTORNEY:  Voodoo?
WITNESS:     We do..
ATTORNEY:  You do?
WITNESS:     Yes , voodoo.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Now doctor , isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep , he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS:  Did you actually pass the bar exam?

____________________________________

ATTORNEY:  The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS:      He's 20, much like your IQ.

_________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS:     Yes.
ATTORNEY:  And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS:     Getting laid.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  She had three children, right?
WITNESS:     Yes.
ATTORNEY:  How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY:   Were there any girls?
WITNESS:      Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS:     By death..
ATTORNEY:  And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS:     Take a guess.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS:     He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY:  Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS:     Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
_____________________________________


ATTORNEY:  Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS:  No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

______________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS:     All of them.. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________


ATTORNEY:  ALL your responses MUST be oral , OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS:     Oral...

_________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS:     The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY:  And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS:     If not, he was by the time I finished.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY:  Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS:     Are you qualified to ask that question?
______________________________________


And last:

ATTORNEY:  Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS:     No.
ATTORNEY:  Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS:     No.
ATTORNEY:  Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS:     No..
ATTORNEY:  So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS:     No.
ATTORNEY:  How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS:     Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY:  I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS:     Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
Mon Nov 22, 2010 5:04 pm
Legend
508 Posts
xD hahahahahahahaha nice baadd
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